Category Archives: Future

The Cicadas Are Coming!

insects.tamu.edu

insects.tamu.edu

The online news media has been anticipating the arrival of Brood II cicadas since the first daffodils bloomed. Here’s the coverage in a nutshell…

“There will be 30 million of them!”

“They’re coming! They’re coming!”

“Hundreds have been spotted in North Carolina” (which probably means an anonymous phone caller asked “I found this weird bug. What do you think it is?”)

“Really! They’re coming!”

“They’re hatching in southern Virginia!” (I live a few miles from the North Carolina border, which to me means southern Virginia. Ain’t seen, heard, nor smelt any yet.)

However, I like cicadas.

Anything that bumps politicians and celebrities off the news is a good thing.

Planning for the Future

sh

Feeling better, the young mother walked down the hall to look into the nursery at her newborn, when she noticed the well-dressed gentleman.

“Which baby is yours?” she asked. The stranger laughed.

“Oh, no, I’m not a parent,” he replied. “I’m a talent scout.”

“Scouting newborns?”

“Absolutely,” he replied. “I’ve got two positions I need to fill, and by the time children reach their first birthday, it’s far too late for grooming.” The new mother looked puzzled.

“Each generation needs to have its pre-teen heartthrobs, and that means the entertainment industry needs to identify candidates early. I’m currently on retainer to find both the male and female pre-teen heartthrobs this time around.”

“Pre-teen heartthrobs?” asked the mother.

“Oh, yes,” the talent scout replied. “Someone for the young girls to gush over; In the past we had Rudolf Valentino, Frank Sinatra, Donny Osmond, boy bands and now, Justin Bieber.”

“And the boys?”

“We take care of them, too. Over the years we provided Shirley Temple, Judy Garland, Annette Funicello, Lady Gaga. Hmmmm. That baby, third from the left might have potential.”

“No!” the mother stated firmly. “I didn’t go through 18 hours of labor so Hollywood could make a nutcase out of my son. I think it would be best for you to leave.

“Now!” she insisted as she walked into the nursery, picked up her son and held him tightly.

Status Report

Stardate 2013.05072013.19.10

Came home from work, tired.

wx.findu.com/ke8yn

wx.findu.com/ke8yn

Scanners indicate potential meteorological event consisting of precipitation, changes in barometric pressure, surface winds and possible deadly electrical activity in the atmosphere.

Indications are that home surrounding of fescue (festuca) Pooideae (lawn grass) is growing outside of optimal parameters. Quickly utilized lawn tractor (shuttle) to ensure compliance to conform with regional norms.

Consulted with representative of other species (Alex – Monk parrot) and he advised me that upon completion of fescue mission, I should withdraw and conduct restorative maneuvers.

Poured wine.

Blogged.

Good night.

Is Knowledge Power?

phren

We are a data driven society. Polls are taken regarding virtually any subject and consume far more of the media than the actual events they attempt to predict. Reliable instant communications allows twenty-four hour news to feed us information on scandals far and wide. We are shocked by the collapse of a clothing factory in Bangladesh or by the suspected use of chemical weapons in Syria. We have access to unemployment data, Gross Domestic Product and how each affects Wall Street in real time.

We believe that if we decode all the data in DNA, we could recreate mammoths, or even dinosaurs.

Satellites feed us data to allow us to accurately predict the weather days in advance (except when the surprise severe storm appears.)

Does that make us powerful? I think not.

Knowledge is only powerful when it is used to make a decision and then execute that decision. If we read about a disaster and it causes us (and countless others) to make a donation to an organization that is helping out, that’s powerful. If knowing about a house fire causes us to check our smoke detectors and buy a fire extinguisher that means something.

Merely knowing is inconsequential. Knowing what to do with what you’ve learned is wherein the power lies.

Random Musings on Reincarnation

I really, really looked

for an appropriate illustration

but none of them were funny!

 

 

I don’t happen to believe in reincarnation, but the concept presents some interesting situations.

If you’re reincarnated, does deja vu feel different?

Could you be charged for 300 years overdue fines on the library book you lost in a previous life?

If you’re married in this life and have an affair with your spouse from a previous life, is it wrong?

If in a previous life you left everything to yourself in a next life, would you have to pay tax on the inheritance?

The worst thing of all?

All through whichever life you’re living, you’d know that when you come back you’d have to eat those awful tasting baby foods and suffer from diaper rash, all over again.

No Gridlock Here

npr

I’m not exactly a liberal, so sometimes NPR rubs me the wrong way. However, NPR does in-depth coverage of issues that only get sound-bite treatment from other sources, so I’m a regular listener.

(Yes, I’m a member, and have been donating for years.)

Occasionally NPR will cover some issues that no one else seems to want to cover.

Recently they investigated why the number of people receiving Social Security Supplemental Security Income (SSI – also known as disability payments) nearly doubled over the past 15 years. It turns out that there’s a whole industry dedicated to getting people disability payments. Who’s a big customer? State governments some of which pay thousands of dollars for each person moved from welfare (a state funded program) to disability (a federally funded program).

Thought provoking – the link is http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/490/trends-with-benefits?act=2#play

Today NPR had a piece describing how in a matter of 30 seconds Congress (the same Congress who can’t seem to agree on anything) passed a bill and got it signed by the President. Of course, this was a SPECIAL bill. A VERY SPECIAL BILL. This bill canceled many of the provisions of the law that made congressional financial trading more transparent. The original bill made it possible to see how lawmakers invest their largesse. Did Senator Whatsisname own stock in the pharmaceutical industry before voting on a bill that benefitted drug companies? The original law was intended to make it possible to find out. The thirty second bill fixed that.

If you’re interested in the details, here’s the link. http://www.npr.org/blogs/itsallpolitics/2013/04/16/177496734/how-congress-quietly-overhauled-its-insider-trading-law

In the recent past I wished Congress could get along and get things done. Now, I’m not so sure.

The Church, Science and Mistakes

Pope Francis graduated as a chemical technician before moving on to study philosophy, psychology and theology. CNN (Link below)

Pope Francis graduated as a chemical technician before moving on to study philosophy, psychology and theology. CNN (Link below)

It seems as if many are watching the Vatican to see what Pope Francis is going to do. Lord knows there are mistakes to be cleaned up.

Being human, and being an expert at making mistakes, I accept the fact that churches and their leaders do the same.

My family is not particularly fond of my mistakes, and I’m not fond of the church’s mistakes.

The relationship between science and theology, for example. The church decided that the sun went around the earth, and when Galileo took a “responsible opposing view” the gloves came off.

The problem was that Galileo was right and the church was wrong.

CNN quoted Monsignor Tomasz Trafny, the Director of the Vatican’s Science and Faith Foundation as saying, “There was a time when theologians thought they understood everything… If you look at what is going on today you will see that theologians are very careful about what they are thinking or speaking about related to scientific issues.” [Click for CNN article]

This is good.

As much as I like the pastor at our church, he can’t seem to tell me why my car makes that funny noise, how to get my lawn to look better and we won’t even talk about how bad his advice was on my golf game.

Nevertheless, on spiritual matters he’s good to have around.

Far Out Vacation

Cheech & Chong(Back in the Day)

Cheech & Chong
(Back in the Day)

Some friends of mine decided to take a vacation trip to one of the states that has recently legalized marijuana. Not exactly my cup of tea, but to each his own.  They’ve never entirely left the sixties.

However, curiosity got the best of me so I stopped over to see if their trip had met their expectations.

“So how was the vacation?” I asked.

“Ummmm. I’m not sure. I sort of can’t remember it,” he said.

“Well, where did you finally decide to go?” I continued.

“I think was either Washington or Colorado,” he answered somewhat vaguely.

“I wish we’d taken pictures,” added his wife. “All I know is it’s a week later and we’ve each gained 20 pounds.”

As for me, I think I’ll stick with Universal Studios and Disney.

Sundown, Good Friday

PietaMichelangelo Buonarroti1499

Pieta
Michelangelo Buonarroti
1499

Satan had never been particularly fond of sundown on Friday, since it marked the beginning of the Jewish Sabbath. Perhaps, two millennia ago he was more comfortable because the Sabbath had become a burden, rather than a cause for joy. The Pharisees had defined most activities, including how far you could walk before you were violating the Sabbath. It was a set of complicated rules rather than a day of rest.

This particular Friday had to be especially disconcerting. Satan had seen Jesus ridiculed, beaten, abused, and tortured. No doubt this pleased him while simultaneously frightening him. Even he knew that things were not as they seemed. He had to wonder what was going to happen.

Many believe that when Jesus cried out, “My God! My God! Why have you forsaken me?” was the point at which Jesus took on all the sins of the world. For the first time in eternity Jesus was not completely connected with the Father and it was terrifying and disorienting.

At that moment, Satan saw countless souls he had seduced, cajoled, lied to, and threatened slip through his very fingers. The justice they deserved was now paid in full, and they were reunited with God.

Jesus told us He had the ability to lay down His life and pick it up again. I think that once He had paid our debt, His job was done and He laid his life down. It was His choice to save us, and His choice to return the Father.

Satan had known from the very beginning that his quest was unachievable, but his ego was such that he continued anyway. I’m sure that even with our redemption, his arrogance demanded that he redouble his efforts. Even today you can see his efforts.

But it doesn’t matter. We have been saved. We have been forgiven. We are loved by our God and by His only begotten Son.

Give thanks. It is right and just.

What the Elder Son Teaches Us

It was another soccer tournament weekend. It’s Monday and back to work, where at least the schedule is more predictable.

At least the games were spaced so I could catch church on Sunday.

Rembrandt van Rijn

Rembrandt van Rijn

The Gospel was the story of the Prodigal Son, which is often dissatisfying because it just doesn’t seem fair.

If the Prodigal Son story played out today, I’m sure there would be at least one lawsuit.

Our deacon gave the homily, and pointed out that the son who stayed home figured may not have merely been loyal and altruistic. The way he looked at it, he was taking care of his upcoming inheritance, so in effect, he was working for himself. Since he was focused on what he expected to get, he didn’t realize and appreciate all the things he had every day.

However, what he said next was what struck me. The deacon suggested that every night when the family gathers for dinner, we should start a litany of all the things we have to be thankful for. He suggested starting small, with such things as life, spouse, children. Each day add a couple of more things. By the end of Lent we may all realize just how blessed we are.

I thought it was a good enough idea that I should share it.

Daylight Savings Time

grill

We’re coming up on the time to “Spring Ahead.” I’ve never figured out if it’s a good economic decision or not. Supposedly they compared parts of Indiana from before they shifted to DST to after their shift and decided that instead of saving money, it cost money.

Who knows?

Who cares?

All I know is I get to cook outside on the grill without the need for my halogen work lights and things cook better when the ambient temperature is above freezing.

I guess that means I’m somewhere at the bottom of Maslow’s hierarchy.

It’s probably because when I grill, it smells good, tastes good, the dog is very attentive and I can play guitar while I’m watching the grill.

Works for me.

BREAKING NEWS!!!!!!

chimney

Reporters seen here sniffing around the chimney of the Sistine Chapel, anxiously awaiting the first sign of smoke.

This just in. Cable News Headlines has just been informed that the Catholic Church still has no Pope! Reliable sources who spoke on the condition of anonymity have reported that the College of Cardinals has not even voted once!

Our reporter, Felix Paparazzi is live at the Vatican.

Felix: “It’s looking pretty grim here as the Catholic Church wanders aimlessly, leaderless, without direction. Catholics around the globe are distressed and in despair with the Church’s hierarchy refusing to act. It’s rumored that the cardinals’ paralysis is a direct result of global warming!

Earlier today I was able to interview Monsignor Nino Fabreze and here’s what he had to say.”

[Pre-recorded video]

Felix: “Why do the cardinals refuse to act? What are they waiting for?”

Monsignor Fabreze: “Well, this is a process steeped in hundreds of years of tradition. The first thing they are waiting for is for all of the cardinals to arrive here in Rome. Once everybody is here, then they can start the process.”

Felix: “Well, there you have it, the Catholic Church in crisis! Back to you in the studio.”

[Cut to commercial]

Something Old, Something New

Virginian-Pilot-logo-piloto

Courtesy of – never mind.

Joe Walsh of the Eagles wrote a song telling how he’s an analog man in a digital world. Now I’m a (very) few years younger than Joe, but I kind of understand. In my case, though, I’ve got one foot in each world.

Does this make me digilog or anatal?

I love the flexibility my Kindle gives me. When I’m traveling I can switch from a non-fiction book, to a thriller, to a computer language lesson while sitting at the restaurant. Whatever mood my muse is in, I can usually satisfy it. If the restaurant has Wi-Fi and my Kindle doesn’t have what I am in the mood for, I can download something more appropriate.

I don’t have to wait for a chance to drive to the bookstore – I can just download whatever interests me.

Although I’m clumsy with the small touchscreen, I can still check my e-mail or see what’s on the web. My Kindle is pretty cool.

However,

I love my morning newspaper. I like to spread the paper out in front of me, leaving just enough room for juice, coffee and an English muffin. I read the newspaper in a specific order. First the national news, followed by the local news and opinions, although the opinion page gets a cursory look unless something catches my interest.

Lately – not so much.

I drop the Sports section on the table in front of my son’s chair.

Then I read the “Daily Break” – where the “Virginian-Pilot” puts the light hearted material – and the all-important comics. If everything works out right, when I get to my coffee, it’s comics time.

I read the paper on-line when I’m traveling, and it works, but just is no way as satisfying as spreading the good old fashioned, cellulose based newspaper in front of my breakfast.

Then, of course, comes the ultimate reason where real books triumph over e-readers. A bathtub full of hot water, with a glass of wine sitting next to it. I’d never take an e-reader into the tub, but a good paperback book makes it perfect.

Pope Brouhaha

Coat of ArmsPope Benedict XVI

Coat of Arms
Pope Benedict XVI

The news media has carried on in their usual way with regard to the retirement of the Pope. Headlines talked about it being “Shocking” and “Unbelievable.”

Say what?

First, when I’m 85, I hope I’m well experienced at being retired. Serving until death is a leftover from the days when the Monarch was expected to actively participate in combat and dodge assassination attempts. Life expectancy was much shorter.

The Catholic Church is like any large organization. Leaders come and leaders go. They tend to come from the same pool of candidates. I suspect that Fortune 500 CEOs reflect a lot of individuals with Harvard MBAs and who grew up thinking country clubs were a normal part of life.

I drive a Ford. I have no idea as to who is the current president of Ford, or who’s on their board of directors. It doesn’t affect me. To a large degree, the same is true of the Pope.

Large powerful organizations do both good and ill. With a two thousand year history, the Catholic Church has had more opportunities to experience errors, suffer from bad leadership, as well as do some good things. The bad stuff is more interesting to talk about.

Look at Catholics, as opposed to the Catholic Church organization and hierarchy. Like most other Christians we get up each morning, pray to do a good job, do some things right, screw up on others, ask forgiveness, and keep on going. Like other Christians we place our faith in Christ, along with our hope and love.

If the news media reported a month from now that the Catholic hierarchy had been unable to elect a Pope, it would not affect most Catholics. We’d still attend Mass Sunday mornings and try to live our faith on a daily basis.

The World Ends! Again!

foxnews.com

foxnews.com

Like almost every other American, I have a smart phone, although I only use a few of its features. I do check e-mail, not so much to actually read all of it, but to skim through and see if there’s anything really interesting. The internet access is sometimes handy, although the slow speed and small screen are significant disincentives. The alarm clock comes in handy when I’m on the road.

When I access the phone, the home screen gives me the current weather – just basics like 23 degrees and clear or whatever. However, it has little gizmos to make the weather more entertaining. If it’s raining, a windshield wiper clears video raindrops off the screen, complete with wiper sounds. If it’s windy, I hear the sound of the wind and see clouds blow around the screen.

This morning, before the alarm went off I reached for my phone. The weather screen showed an asteroid streaking toward the earth accompanied by the sound of destruction and screaming.

I’d never known the smart phone to be wrong before, so I took immediate action. I’m a trained professional! I’ve dealt with all kinds of emergencies and disasters throughout my life, so I knew exactly how to handle this.

I immediately yanked the alarm clock power cord from the wall. I fluffed my pillow crawled back under my covers and reveled in the fact that the bed was so warm.

Rule #1: If the world is going to end, you might as well sleep in.

Turns out it was a glitch with the phone.

I still enjoyed the extra sleep.

The Best Laid Plans

The best laid schemes o’ Mice an’ Men,
Gang aft agley,
An’ lea’e us nought but grief an’ pain,
For promis’d joy!
– Robert Burns
My_to_do_list_for_today_n_n_Img01

This past weekend was a three day weekend because of Presidents’ Day. My wife and I decided that I should take a vacation day along with it. Four days off in a row! What opportunities! We could get so much done and then just spend some time together, maybe shopping, going out for a meal, or whatever. I had a list of things I wished to accomplish, starting with cleaning out my study. Every week I think, “Maybe next weekend I’ll get my study in order.” With four days, this was finally going to be the weekend!

Friday I realized I had a dental appointment after work, but no worries, the weekend would start immediately after that. Except that my daughter had soccer practice, and my wife was already gone with my son to his practice. When practice was over, I expected her to come running off the field so we could head home; instead newly inspired, she continued to practice some of her moves solo, and was most unhappy when I suggested we get headed.

It was now late.

Saturday offered all kinds of possibilities, although Katie had a soccer game in the morning, and Adam had a game in the evening. It had started to snow, and in true Virginia fashion, the weathermen (excuse me, meteorologists), reeking of adrenaline, were describing every possible catastrophic outcome with bated breath.

The officials at the Field House cut the second half of the soccer game by 5 minutes to clear people out early, so naturally the coach saw this as a chance to wax poetic with the team after the game.

We grabbed a couple of pizzas on the way home.

Sunday was the great “Battle of the Kitchen Sink” over which I ultimately prevailed. Barb took Adam to his flag football game while I grilled steaks so that they would be ready when everyone got home. The only thing scarier than a starving teenager is a teenager who’s starving because of athletic exertion. The meal was ready on time and casualties were averted.

Monday. The long weekend is quickly slipping away. The funny noise in my wife’s car got louder and we dropped it off for service. It was a very disturbing sound. If you listened carefully you could hear spelled out in Morse Code, “I’m going to be expensive!”

Even though there was no school, Adam’s high school was conducting tryouts for the soccer teams. This was three hours in the morning, three hours break, and then three hours in the afternoon. I had been marinating meat for several days so we could have shawarma for dinner, so I was focused on that.

Katie had several projects for school that should have been done earlier in the weekend, but now demanded her attention and she demanded mine.

Then the dog got sick.

Not terribly unusual, as any dog owner will attest.

In the early evening it was obvious that the dog was more than just sick. Barb drove and Adam carried the dog into our veterinarian’s office. After x-rays and IV fluids, the vet told us he needed to go to the emergency veterinary hospital. We waited there until almost midnight. After weighing the options presented by the vet, we decided to go ahead and have her perform emergency surgery.

To make a long story short, when Louis gets a bone, he doesn’t just gnaw on it, he completely destroys it. Well, not completely – bone shards had perforated his stomach and small intestine. The surgery seemed successful and Louis should be home tomorrow.

Now it’s Tuesday – may vacation day and day four of my four day extended weekend.

I’ve revised my “To-Do” List.

  1. Shred old “To-Do” List
  2. Unconditionally surrender

Maybe next weekend is when I’ll get my study in order.

Pope Benedict XVI

pope

Today the Pope shocked the world with the announcement that he will vacate his position at the end of the month. Opinions and commentary abound.

My thought is that all things fit God’s will. I have no idea where this will end, but I am confident that the outcome will be subservient to His will.

That’s a comforting thought.

The Good Stuff

Some of the good stuff -Music by the Moody Blues

Some of the good stuff -
Music by the Moody Blues

As you may have notice, lately I’ve been trying to write humor. Something to just cheer people up.

I look at the online news (CNN, FoxNews, NBCNews, etc.) and they are full of nothing but doom and gloom. Worse still, the stories that are real downers stay on their pages for exceptionally long times. It’s like they’re trying to milk tragedy for all it’s worth.

I know that the media believes, “If it bleeds – it leads.” Murder, for example, is going to make the headline on page 1 of the newspaper, while the good things (if they’re lucky) will end up on the middle page of the Sunday “Living” section next to the ad for hearing aids.

Therefore, if you want to be famous – kill somebody. Otherwise, if you’re really lucky and work real hard, you’ll end up with the hearing aids.

The media isn’t going to change. Sadly, they’re not going to wake up one morning to overpowering guilt and shame, repent and try to do good things. However, they ignore the fact that long term, this is not an effective tactic.

The most experienced practitioners of these practices, the print media, are dying off. It used to be that cities would have two or three daily newspapers. If something extraordinary happened, they actually would stop the presses and print an extra edition. The cliché newspaper boy shouting, “Extra! Extra! Read all about it!” actually was real.

Today most cities have one and only one newspaper, and even those are at risk. It’s no wonder – the newspaper delivers the exact same information as what was on the internet the day before. Whatever the “wire services” (aka The Associated Press) decides to send out will be on CNN today and tomorrow in the morning newspaper – often word for word.

Of course, most people already got the “tweet” and so even CNN is providing second hand news.

News magazines are practically a novelty. If you’ve got a copy of Newsweek, put it in an acid free plastic sleeve and save it with your pristine copy of “Amazing Fantasy #15″ (the comic book in which Spiderman first appeared.) The printed Newsweek may also become a collectors’ item.

Interestingly, not all magazines are at risk. I look forward to my monthly “Smithsonian,” “National Geographic,” and my technical magazines. Why? Because they make me think and they make me smile. My wife and I have real live interesting intellectual discussions about articles in “Smithsonian.”

“Make” magazine is full of things from basement inventors and weird and wonderful projects. Want to play around with a 3 dimensional printer – “Make” is the place to start. How about programming a credit card sized computer that costs around $30 to automatically water your plants? “Make” again.

Our kids love to learn, as did we when we were kids.

“Help me learn to ride a bicycle!”

“I want to take gymnastics!”

“Can you teach me some magic tricks?”

“Can I try soldering?”

My son recently asked us to teach him how to wash his clothes. I don’t expect that he’ll regularly take on this chore, but he was proud of himself for learning – as well he should.

This world is full of wonder and potential. It was designed and handmade by God himself. No subcontractors. No shoddy workmanship. “…and He saw that it was good.”

There’s lots of good stuff to learn and enjoy, and that’s what I’m going to focus.

Anybody with me?

W8A

 

duck“Hi, I’m Steve and I bought Windows 8.”

Hi, Steve

“I admit it. I fell for the hype. It wasn’t the touch screen, or the applications. I believed the stories that it was more stable and faster than Windows 7.”

How many copies of Windows 8 did you get?

“Well, my daughter’s computer was new enough that when we upgraded hers to Windows 8 it only cost $14.99.”

So only one copy? Come on, you can tell us.

“She seemed to like it, so I installed it on three other computers”

So you inflicted Windows 8 on four innocent computers?

“They had this great price! It was new technology!”

What happened next?

“Some of my hardware wasn’t compatible with Windows 8. Some of my programs wouldn’t work. I had to uninstall it from one computer.”

And did that work?

“{Sob} I couldn’t find the Vista reinstallation disk, so I had to go back to Windows XP! {Sob}”

And the other computers?

“I have to uninstall Windows 8 and reinstall Windows 7 on one computer. One is sort of kind of working.  My daughter won’t speak to me!  I don’t know if it’s because of her computer or just one of her mood swings!”

Well, don’t worry, you’re among friends. We’ll help you get through this.

“Thank you. I really needed that.”

Now let’s talk with this nice couple over here. Please introduce yourselves.

“Hi, I’m Bill, and this is my Melinda. We didn’t buy Windows 8 – the company I used to, uh, work for, sent us copies for free.”

Hi, Bill and Melinda.

Blogging is Different

Blogging is different from many other technological applications. It’s meant to be shared.

It’s kind of like how music used to be.

Most of today’s marvels act to separate and isolate us.

iphone-how-to-curious-focused-texting-cell-phone

Sitting at the table at the restaurant texting someone who is somewhere else (ignoring the people around them, as well.)

Playing Angry Birds on my iPod, iPad, iPhone, or iWant to be alone.

Listening to music, all by myself with my earbuds blocking out everything and everybody.

Driving with 90% of my concentration devoted to the cell phone. (I wonder when some people die, if the mortician will have trouble releasing their arm from the cellphone-to-the-ear pose. Maybe they’ll just make specially shaped caskets…)

On the other hand, blogs allow us to communicate across both time and space.

To share ideas.

To share a joke and laugh together.

Thanks for letting me share.