Category Archives: Government

The Truth About Immigrants

Ellis Island osu.edu

Ellis Island
osu.edu

In America it has happened over and over. It happened when the Germans came here and the French. The same with the Irish and the Italians.

You’d think we’d learn, but we don’t.

When a group immigrates, they fumble around for a few years, then figure things out; those who have been here a while teach the tricks to the newcomers.

Then it starts.

They get jobs or start businesses. They pay taxes. The latest immigrants are paying social security taxes to fund the baby boomers. They serve in the military. They become citizens. They become friends and neighbors.

It’s got to stop!

Look at Me! Look at Me! (But Respect my Privacy) Look at Me!

Don Adams "Get Smart"

Don Adams
“Get Smart”

We interrupt this uproar about the NSA to present the following commercial announcements:

The left handed velvet backscratcher that you looked at last week is now on sale at the following internet sellers…

According to your cellphone GPS, here’s a coupon for the store across the street.

People who looked at left handed backscratchers, are often interested in left handed scissors.

Your Instagram of your Chicken Parmigiana a Bella Piano’s has gone viral.

Uncle Vito’s Frozen Chicken Parmesan is on sale at your local Food Shoppe.

Did you know that many people use a left handed back scratcher while eating Uncle Vito’s Chicken Parmesan?

Facebook wants you to be sad about those poor chickens.

#sad chickens

We now return you to the furor over NSA, already in progress.

Independence Day

Jefferson Obelisk Courtesy Monticello.org

Jefferson Obelisk
Courtesy Monticello.org

He wrote his own epitaph.

HERE WAS BURIED; THOMAS JEFFERSON; AUTHOR OF THE; DECLARATION OF AMERICAN INDEPENDENCE OF THE STATUTE OF VIRGINIA FOR RELIGIOUS FREEDOM AND FATHER OF THE UNIVERSITY OF VIRGINIA BORN APRIL 2, 1743 O.S. DIED JULY 4. 1826

Jefferson and John Adams are as essential to America as was George Washington. Of the three, Jefferson was the most complicated – a wealth of intellectual virtue but pragmatically able to ignore his own beliefs in the name of commerce. Author of the Declaration of Independence, yet an owner of slaves.

There is a fascinating radio program in which historian Clay Jenkinson portrays Thomas Jefferson but such that Jefferson is able to converse with us in our time. If you haven’t heard it, give it a try. Click here for more.

http://www.jeffersonhour.com/

 

Corporate People

supremecourt_0 copy

With the benefit of 20/20 hindsight we can see that it was inevitable. Unfortunately for the species Homo sapiens those who lived at the time were blissfully unaware as to where they were headed. Even with a population of over seven billion people, by 2010 they had already become an endangered species

The role and rights of corporation had been expanding throughout the history of the United States. In the 19th century corporations gained limited rights, allowing them to enter into contracts. It was believed that by incorporating, the people running a business could enjoy all of the benefits while avoiding much of the risk that comes with commerce. By the early 21st century, corporations’ involvement in the political process was protected and guaranteed, which pleased the “1 percent,” the wealthy elite. After all, they proclaimed, “Corporations are people, too!”

Corporate shareholders believed at first that this expansion of rights was passed through to them, since they owned and managed the corporations. Little did they know.

It was the election of 2024 that caught even the rich by surprise when TMZ, Inc. – a former zinc bushing manufacturer – was elected to Congress. Corporations contributed the most to the political campaigns with the obvious outcome. This trend continued with the mid-term elections of 2026 resulting in three caucuses – Democrat, Republican, and Corporate.

Congressman TMZ conducted political affairs as instructed by its board of directors. Other corporate bodies, however, had been able to slash costs and boost their quarterly earnings by aggressively automating and outsourcing what couldn’t be computerized to countries with cheaper labor costs. Over time they began to operate with progressively less human intervention. Eventually, most corporations eliminated all human positions except for a small contingent charged with maintenance and repair.

In 2028, Megalith Holdings Corporation was elected president. One group, dubbed “birthers” claimed that the constitution required that the president be a “natural born citizen.” In order to resolve the issue before Inauguration Day, their case was heard, and appealed at each judicial level. Ultimately the Supreme Court ruled that since MHC came into existence by virtue of its incorporation in the state of Delaware, and that corporations are people, too, Megalith was, in fact, a native born American, and therefore eligible for the office of president. The majority opinion was written by Chief Justice Universal Communications, LLC. The minority opinion, written by 97 year old Justice Abigail Adams, was short and to the point; “We’re screwed.”

Commerce slowed as automated public corporations focused on acquiring patents and suing one another for infringement. Manufacturing was deemed insufficiently profitable and shut down. The same occurred with the large farming operations controlled by corporations. This resulted in massive starvation among humans, obliterating the species.

There are rumors – there are always rumors – of small groups of humans who have gathered into tribes and subsist as hunter gatherers. It is said that they wait for the day when either the demand for electricity exceed the supply or that enough electrical plants break down so that the corporate computers can no longer operate.

I hope this information has been useful. If you’ll excuse me, I need to have my files backed up and my memory defragmented.

Good day.

In the Name of God, I Kill You!

courtesy Voice of America

courtesy Voice of America

The Sunni extremists are wreaking havoc in Shia towns in Iraq; Iraqi soldiers who are also Sunni are apparently laying down their arms rather than defending the Shia civilians.

Allahu Akbar!

It’s a far too familiar tale throughout the world.

The Roman persecution of the Christians.

The deaths of Catholics and Anglicans as they fought over the English throne.

The lynching of blacks by God fearing whites in the South.

The extermination of the Jews in World War II.

The list goes on and on. We never seem to learn.

When we die and face our God, I am quite certain He is not going to say, “Great job of killing people!”

 

Welcome Carbon Dioxide*

* If you can’t sing the songs from “Hair” you won’t get it…

can copy

An unnamed co-worker pointed out to me today that if carbon dioxide is to be controlled as a pollutant, then we need to think about our beverages.

Hmmm.

Edward Snowden et al

Bond. James Bond.

Bond.
James Bond.

So Edward Snowden now tells us that he was not just a computer administrator but also a spy – not only for the NSA, but also the CIA and the Defense Intelligence Agency. I’m sure that will be followed up by his claim to the Heisman Trophy, how he was the inspiration for Mother Teresa and his groundbreaking work in neurosurgery. Not too shabby for a guy who never even graduated from high school.

It got me thinking – we all love James Bond, but that’s because he’s a good guy and therefore on our side. On the other hand, the idea of someone listening in on our telephone calls is just plain creepy. (Although those of us old enough to remember party lines know that an extra listener was to be expected.) So what does it really mean?

There are 7.1 billion people in the world, 317 million in the United States. There are almost 328 million cell phones in the U.S. – more phones than people. If each phone is used for one hour a month, which every parent with teenagers knows is ridiculously low, then each year there would be almost 4 billion hours of phone conversations. This would require nearly 2 million full time intelligence employees to keep up with the phone calls, ignoring e-mails, internet browsing, traffic cameras, black helicopters, drones, and other spy stuff.

I think that even if phone conversations were routinely monitored into, most of us would get lost in the clutter. Sorry, but your selfie just isn’t that interesting.

On the other hand, people who buy chemicals that just happen to be used for making bombs, or send fan mail to known terrorists; people who want to learn to fly but aren’t interested in learning to land just might be interesting enough to give a listen.

Personally, I think that’s a good thing.