Musings

When you see signs announcing a psychics’ convention, doesn’t it make you wonder? After all, they should KNOW, shouldn’t they?

Who is the sick individual who figured out how to put the pins into new dress shirts in such a fashion that there will always be one left to poke you, no matter how carefully you search.

Is there a mother who brags to her friends that it was HER son who invented the Chia Pet? (Sorry, ladies – not passing over you, but I just can’t see a woman stooping so low…)

If no one had invented greeting cards, would we have fewer holidays?

If the US Postal Service worked like the cell phone companies, we’d each have to buy a certain quantity of stamps each month and if we didn’t send enough mail, the unused stamps would expire. (If they implement this, it’s all my fault.)

If any of my kids were still babies, the last thing I’d want for them is some politician’s lips kissing them. (On the other hand, changing diapers might fit better with the profession.)

Why do women wonder about men and their “tool fetish” when a similar attitude toward shoes and handbags seems perfectly normal to them.

When I cook, there are several things I wish I had:

1. A sous chef to wash, peel, slice, dice and measure out all the ingredients

2. A scullery maid to clean and wipe up my mess and then wash all the pots and pans that can’t go into the dishwasher

3. One of those two bay ovens the television chefs use – you put the uncooked meal into the bottom oven and immediately take the cooked meal out of the top one (and you thought microwave ovens were special!)

 

Why do men hate being lost almost as much as they hate asking for directions?

 

After using a QWERTY keyboard – do you have trouble with something that shows the alphabet in alphabetical order?

 

 

 

 

 

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