Daily Archives: November 1, 2012

Work, Work, Work, Work, Work!*

I’ve been outrageously busy at work preparing for a meeting. Since I’m a Federal employee, I just wanted to let you taxpayers know that there actually is an effort to keep costs down. The number of justifications I have to complete in order to travel for work is sufficiently onerous that anyone who has the option would quickly decide to stay home. It has to be really, really important before you’re willing to run the gauntlet for orders to travel.

As an employee, it’s an ordeal. As a taxpayer, I approve.

So, here are other thoughts…

We have a combination printer copier at work. It prints, it copies (obviously) it does dual sided copies, it enlarges, it scans, it folds, staples, spindles and mutilates.

So why doesn’t it know that if 3 of its 4 trays are filled with the same size paper oriented the same way, it doesn’t have to stop all printing and wait until Tray 1 is refilled?

At what age did it happen to you?

Twenty?

Thirty?

Forty?

At what age did you realize that your “Permanent Record” was no longer of any consequence?

I always wanted to read that the Permanent Record Storage Vault was destroyed by fire, flood or hacked by Wiki-Leaks throwing the country into chaos. I pictured it as some cavernous bomb proof shelter buried deep underground in West Virginia accessible only by a secret trap door in an otherwise nondescript Waffle House.

But, alas, it was all but a ruse by our high school teachers.

Today’s high school teachers have to tell a far better story to the kids today.

* Governor LePetomaine – “Blazing Saddles