Before World War II, most men wore undershirts – the ones that had the manly spaghetti straps over the shoulders. The military issued tee shirts, and a fashion trend followed.

We made tee shirts upscale by adding a collar, a couple of buttons and an alligator embroidered over the left breast. Look closely, it’s an alligator, not a crocodile. If you think it’s a guy playing polo, you may need to clean your glasses.

Somewhere along the line, someone decided to start printing slogans.

"Have a nice day!" said Forrest Gump as he continued running.

“Have a nice day!” said Forrest Gump as he continued running.

“Property of University of Akron Athletic Department”

“I’m with Stupid ->”

{FRONT} “I have a degree in Liberal Arts”

{BACK} “Do you want fries with that?”

{FRONT} “On that grand and glorious 8th day God created beer”

{BACK} “and gave it to the Irish!”

Why do I bring this up?

My suggestion to improve the world; if you’re going to wear a tee shirt with a witty saying, please keep your arms by your side so we can read it. If it is continued on the back, periodically doing a 180 degree turn long enough for people to read the punch line would be appreciated. And please, PLEASE, don’t think people are looking at you. It’s the witty saying on your shirt that catches attention, not your corporeal presence.

Otherwise, just wear a plain old shirt.

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