Sources who declined to be identified have provided the following information.
In the hallway of the Capitol Building, several Tea Partiers demanded Harry Reid’s lunch money. This was their 42nd unsuccessful attempt.
Meanwhile, Senator Ted Cruz threatened to hold his breath until he passed out, if they didn’t promise to keep trying.
Speaker John Boehner when asked about the incident, replied, “The devil, I mean Ted Cruz, made me do it. I didn’t want to but he made me!”
Meanwhile, Nancy Pelosi yelled, “Will you all be quiet! I’m still trying to read this Affordable Healthcare Act to see what’s in it!”
Other sources have indicated that President Obama responded with, “As the highest elected official, and the spiffiest dresser since Harry Truman, if I do say so myself, I’d like to say nyaa nyaa nya nyaa nyaa!”
Unfortunately, when Ted Cruz passed out, no one seemed to care.