Undocumented Features

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Former Washing Machine Photo Daily Mail

Among software types there’s an old joke that programs never have bugs—merely undocumented features.

Hardware I catching up:

  • Airbags that spontaneously deploy and throw shrapnel at the car’s occupants,
  • Cars that adjust the engine to run one way during emission testing and another for regular driving,
  • Smartphones that burst into flames,
  • AND, my personal favorite—washing machines that explode

People today don’t realize how good they have it. When I was a kid, you had to do all these kinds of things the hard way—by hand. It was tough. If you wanted to blow up the washing machine, first you had to stuff the tub with a $#!+load of firecrackers with the fuses connected. There was always enough moisture left inside the washing machine so that half of them would get soggy. Still, once you lit the fuse, you had to run like hell to get out of the way. If the fuse fizzled out, you never knew how long to wait to go back and try to relight it without accidently blowing yourself up. We worked for results, and when we blew up a washing machine, we were proud!

Today, people just expect these things to happen all by themselves.

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