Daily Archives: November 4, 2017

Off Year Elections

Next Tuesday we have elections in Virginia for governor, lieutenant-governor, attorney general, and various gerrymandered offices that mean absolutely zip.

Our current governor has not gone to jail—at least not yet—well, so far as I know. Our previous governor was convicted, but won on appeal. Our current candidates flang (as in past tense of fling) so much—how do I say this politely? Help me here—Bullshit? Okay, so bullshit is the most appropriate word. The current candidates for governor flang so much bullshit at one another that it is embarrassing. By the way, all the negative ads seem to feature the same female voice; whoever she is, she’ll speak—with passion—for whichever candidate crosses her palm with gold. There are words for people like that—shill is one of the kinder ones.

Don’t smirk—I’ll bet that your state/county/parish/city/township/whatever is going through the same experience.

Help a little old lady across the street? Obviously obstructing highway progress!

Picked up someone who fell down? Corrupting healthcare! Wait—the person you picked up was brought into the country without a visa at the age of three weeks? You’re destroying the sovereignty of these United States!

All stop!

Let’s look at these issues in terms of their effect in fifty and one hundred years. What if we had used that perspective in 1865, at the end of the Civil War? At the end of the First World War? We might have avoided the Second World War. Think about it.

So, what should we do?

Me, I’m tempted to vote for the person who is the target of the most unproven, inconsequential negative ads.

On a national level, we could always redesign the Statue of Liberty; put her into waste-waders to deal with rising sea levels, and replace her torch with an outstretched arm to warn people to stay away.

As Gallagher, the comedian used to say, “People, you just haven’t thought these things through!” Okay, if we haven’t, let’s stop and think.

Thinking things through is good.