Shhh! They’re Listening!

Blogging is the only social media in which I engage. Why? As far as I can tell, neither Mark Zuckerberg nor Jeff Bezos follow my blog.

I’m sure that they’re fine people who would be interesting neighbors. Imagine a neighborhood block party with Bezos showing up in an Amazon truck loaded with goodies for everyone. Heck, he might even do a Blue Origin spaceship flyby for entertainment.

On the other hand, it’s creepy knowing that their companies seem to watch every single thing we do. If they made a movie about their data gathering, it could be called, I Know What You Did Last Summer, and Last Week, and Last Night When You Closed the Blinds and Turned Off the Lights in Your Bedroom. It’s, like I said, creepy.

I don’t have any big secrets. The biggest secrets I have are the ones I keep from myself, like, “Where did I leave my car keys?” or “Why did I just walk into this room?” Nevertheless, if someday I did have a secret (like suddenly realizing that I was wearing one black sock and one Navy blue one), I don’t want Jeff and Mark blabbing it all over the internet.

The best way I can explain my aversion is to compare social media sites to the 81 year-old Homeowners’ Association President named Karen. She’s constantly peering through her window on the lookout for serious violations of the deed restrictions and covenants–things like having the wrong color curtains or a non-standard garbage can. She never sleeps, lest a violation occur, strapping on her night-vision goggles promptly at sunset to make sure standards are maintained under any circumstances.

It makes you wonder what juicy tidbits Jeff and Mark know about HER?

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