Tag Archives: family

Us vs. Me

Posted on May 19, 2018 | 1 comment

 

illustration-of-human-evolution-ending-with-smart-phone-resize

“Wait, I need to take a selfie!”

Far too many events today are due to decisions by people who think only of themselves.

This is unnatural.

The hermit, alone in his cave, has always been an idiosyncratic caricature. The word hermit is derived from the word for desert or desert dweller. Deserts are not particularly attractive to people who depend on hunting and gathering. Deserts are more successful as after the invention of are air-conditioned houses and refrigerated food trucks. (Casinos, although optional, seem inevitable.)

Humans from earliest times sought out one another.  Our ancestors, the Homo erectus, (stop thinking dirty thoughts–it refers to having the ability to stand upright) or Homo sapiens neanderthalensis  tended to keep their families together, eventually becoming tribes. Some believe that the reason that there are no identifiable descendants of the Neanderthals is because the two groups combined and interbred, ultimately resulting in us, Homo sapiens.

We belong together, but sometimes are reluctant to admit it. As such, in order to survive and prosper, we must look at things in terms of the common good. Life is not a zero-sum game (if I win, you lose). It is a life-or-death struggle in which WE win or lose.

I could wax poetic for another 300 pages, which I might enjoy, but WE, as a totality, would not, so I’ll stop.

* Links courtesy of Wikipedia. If you use Wikipedia, then use PayPal to send them a few bucks–better yet, a few bucks a month.

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Posted in Communications, Culture, Education, Family, Friends, History, Immigration, People, Philosophy, Science, Technology, Video Games

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Teenagers Are Cheap?

Posted on March 30, 2018 | Leave a comment

As a newly acclaimed Philosopher-without-portfolio, I have taken my responsibilities seriously, to think about whatever needs to be thought about–without restrictions. I recently completed and submitted my income taxes. Naturally, that involves a great deal of thought, usually such things as, “I need something for my headache,” or “I don’t usually drink hard liquor, but it’s beginning to sound better and better.”

I use TurboTax, which is causes mixed feelings. Yes, it is helpful and yes, it’s about 1/10 the cost of having someone prepare it for me; however, it’s parent company, and all the companies that have anything to do with tax preparation, were the ones who lobbied (a polite term for hiring and unleashing high paid but unscrupulous experts) to prevent the simplification of the tax code. After all, if taxes were simple enough to submit on a post card, these people might have to get honest jobs.

But I digress (it’s a philosophical thing).

One of the many oddities in the tax code is the child tax credit. This is means you can reduce your federal tax by up to $1000 per child. The criteria include that the child lived with you, is your dependent, you paid for their support (food, clothing, etc.). It also requires that the child be younger than seventeen.

Now, I’ll reserve my opinion about politicians, the Internal Revenue Service, lobbyists, etc., but do they have any idea as to how costs change as a child gets older. I could clothe both my kids for a year for the same amount of money as I now spend on their shoes. Once they hit that magic age to get a driver’s license, auto insurance increases.

With two teenagers with drivers licenses I spend as much on car insurance in two years as what my first house cost. One of them is away at college, can’t have his car on campus, but since it’s less than 100 miles, the price stays the same. Add in the class photos, yearbooks, formal dances, etc., and those incidentals for college, like books, tuition, room and board, and you get the picture.

But someone has decided that kids must be cheaper after they turn 17 and included it in the tax code. They must be in one of those states where recreational marijuana is not only legal, but can be written off as a business expense.

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Posted in Business, Culture, Education, Government, Humor, Philosophy, Taxes

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I’ve Been Busy—Not Ignoring You

Posted on December 30, 2017 | Leave a comment

Over the past few weeks, I’ve been preparing the materials for an emergency communications course. It’s amazing that when someone else has prepared over 600 PowerPoint slides (with notes) that it would take so much time to update. Why? Because what we know today about dealing with disasters is more than what we knew before Hurricanes Harvey, Irma, and Maria. Personally, I believe that being better prepared for the future is a good thing.

On the other hand, I’m working on my short story—which has become at least a novelette (a short version of a short book? Huh?)—continues to develop. The more I learn about the characters (and more characters keep popping up), the more complex—but interesting—the story becomes. However, if a new character appears, a whole lot of the backstory changes. As a writer, I have a certain duty to the characters. Without me, they are doomed to shrivel away to nothingness, through no fault of their own. They deserve better, so I try to tell their stories. So far, the characters include a not-quite-dead aged business multi-multi-billionaire, several lawyers, most of whom are self-serving, but one of whom has a national security background, a distant relative who can see how the pieces fit, and someone (thing?) who seems to have many of the answers, but who is known as Zaznoz (sounds like a new drug or a new exercise routine to me).

Then I do need to devote time to the day job.

Not to mention that we celebrated Christmas with close friends, followed by my daughter-in-law and the grandchildren, who drove ten hours (I think she was being nice and understated the journey length) to visit us and to make for a wonderful time.

Oh, and my older son used his 3D printer to make my Christmas gift—a full size, accurate replica of Han Solo’s blaster. (Is that cool or what?)

Han Solo’s Blaster (Let’s me shoot first).

 

So, as you see, it’s not lack of interest in blogging, just lack of time.

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Posted in Actor, Blog, Celebrity, Communications, Culture, Family, Friends, Holidays, Media, People, Philosophy, Writing

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Beware of Sermon!

Posted on May 31, 2015 | Leave a comment
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Today’s Sunrise from Virginia Beach, VA, USA.

Sorry, we interrupt the sunrise over the Atlantic to deal with some totally expected, unsurprising idiocy from the media (as in not too bright….etc.).

Fox News had two stories today;

Is your number of sex partners normal?

AND

Is Christianity really at an end? (Although after the teasing, slightly provocative headline it does state that the demise is overstated.)

First, let’s talk about sex partners. Reasonable people may make mistakes while searching for someone with whom they can share a beautiful interdependence. Others take advantage of this. In a perfect world a shining arrow would appear over them perfect sex/love/sharing kitchen, children, soccer duties, etc. partner.  That partner may not be perfect, but would be a perfect fit for you.

Second, if Christianity were at an end, (and I weren’t a Christian), I’d head for the hills. I mean I’d head for the hills that would make the Mount Everest Sherpas pass out. If God invested his only Son in us and now Christianity is at an end, I think He’d have every reason to say, “That’s it! Let’s throw in the cards and I’m going to open a sealed deck and deal a new hand.

End of sermon.  Back to the sunrise.

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Posted in Communications, Culture, Media, Philosophy, Religion, Uncategorized

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It’s NOT Speed-dating!

Posted on April 28, 2015 | Leave a comment
The Persistence of Memory Salvador Dali (and his mustache) Courtesy about.com

The Persistence of Memory
Salvador Dali (and his mustache)
Courtesy about.com

Fortunately, I’m past those that deal with dating, on-and-off relationships, and other unsure bets. I am the embodiment of the line from When Harry Met Sally, “Promise me I’ll never be out there again.”

Especially given some of the strange rituals that accompany the process these days. Speed-dating? Really?

Apparently you sit with a person of whichever sex interests you for a very brief period of time—as in minutes—and try to learn enough about the other person to determine if he or she might be worth more time (apparently if that other person has the same opinion of you).

Imagine my horror when I realized that having two teenagers at home is just like speed-dating my wife. We have five minutes in the morning before we each head in different directions.

“When did you say Katie’s trip was?”

“Did I hear something about a soccer tournament for Adam?”

“I’ll have to get back to you on that.”

“Wait, did you pay the credit card bill?”

“Call me.”

“No you call me, maybe we can do lunch.”

I’m going to go down to the office supply store and get a couple of those “Hello, My name is:” stickers, and a letter of introduction from some high and lofty personage, and see if that….

Ooops, sorry, gotta run.

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Posted in Arts, Communications, Culture, Family, Humor, People, Philosophy, Sports

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Weekend

Posted on April 27, 2014 | Leave a comment

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I guess I could claim that I didn’t get anything done this weekend.

Spent all day Saturday with other ham radio operators providing communications for the local “Tour de Cure” – a bicycle ride/fund raiser for diabetes research.

Sunday, after church, went and babysat my granddaughter so my daughter-in-law could catch up on some chores. Grabbed a nap then cooked dinner for my son’s 16th birthday.

On the other hand, I everything done that was important.

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Posted in Culture, Family, People, Philosophy

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Thanksgiving

Posted on November 28, 2013 | Leave a comment

It’s Thanksgiving – the traditional start of the second phase of the Christmas shopping season; the first phase began after Halloween.

Once upon a time, in my life, Thanksgiving was a time for the family to gather. For a few years I was in the right place at the right time to host the family Thanksgiving. Alas, I was the one whose destiny moved me away from the rest of my family.

This Thanksgiving was more different than most.

My 15 year old son was off on his first solo trip. He’s headed to Baton Rouge, LA to see an LSU game up close and personal. He’s an LSU fan both by genetics and environment. We’ll just leave it at that.

I’ve mentioned my father’s current situation in the past. Physically he’s still challenged; however, when I speak with him on our daily calls, I can still make him laugh. How can we laugh in the face of death? We’ve connected on a level that neither of us ever expected. I’d rather we share it with laughter even if it’s amidst any tears.

But back to Thanksgiving.

As I’ve gotten older, I worry less about the Holidays in terms of their spiritual significance.

I am not in the proverbial, privileged 1%. However, I am blessed that my family does not lack for anything critical. When an unexpected challenge occurs, the answer – like manna in the desert – always appears.

We Catholics are taught to begin and end our prayers with the sign of the cross. I told my dad that I rarely use the sign of the cross outside of Sunday Mass; on a daily basis, I never quite finish my prayer. In the morning, I wish God a good day (How stupid [but sincere] is that?) I walk down the hall at work and thank God that I have a job – and a good one at that. Sometimes I just say, “Hi. I’m thinking of you.” Oh, and by the way God, I love you and am happy that you love me.

My Thanksgiving is every day.

Of course, my begging for forgiveness and mercy is also every day.

So today, I give thanks for my family. I give thanks for the blessing of a God who is able to focus on me and every other one of His children so up close and personal. Tomorrow I expect to be thankful all over again.

There is so much to give thanks for.

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Posted in Culture, Holidays, People, Philosophy, Religion

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Quickstart Guide for New Parents

Posted on August 13, 2013 | Leave a comment

baby

Congratulations on starting your family. As a new parent you may be concerned about properly raising your child. There’s no need to worry, all of the documentation required is included with your new baby.

This Quickstart Guide will give you key information on raising your family until you have time to read the entire manual.

Your oldest child will act as a practice model. It is expected that you will be more attentive, more restrictive and generally more paranoid about this child. It is normal to check on a first baby every few minutes when sleeping to make sure he/she’s breathing. You can expect to favor healthy, possibly organic-locally grown and home pureed foods. You may decide to restrict television to educational channels or prohibit it entirely. Every bump and minor bruise will cause you to rush to the emergency room.

However, subsequent children will require less attention. For your second or later child you will permit them to eat whatever they want, watch television 23 hours a day, and only missing limbs or arterial blood spurts will capture your attention. In addition, these younger children come equipped with the highly developed ability to irritate your oldest child and cause him/her to misbehave badly. This sibling interaction will keep the entire family involved for hours.

It’s normal that you and your spouse will each have very specific ideas as to how the child should be raised. Each of you will expect the other to adapt on issues from cultural mores, manners, education, and hobbies right down to details, such as the correct way to fold clothes. Don’t worry, because you’re both wrong.

You may have received the optional “advice” feature for your child. Ideally this is provided through a maiden aunt who will be happy to provide unsolicited advice on how children should be raised and direction on all manner of parenting issues.

Again, this is only a Quickstart Guide. Remember to read the entire Child Rearing Handbook, which will save you much time and anguish. The Child Rearing Handbook is contained in the same envelope as your child’s warranty card, and receipt in case you decide to return or exchange the child. These items can be found conveniently located fg hu6th heiemn ded.

If you have any questions or problems, please contact us 1-8hg-stf-xd#@ or at http://www.&^hsg463nbgm.com/hasythr

Once again, congratulations on starting your family.

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Posted in Business, Communications, Culture, Education, Family, Future, Healthcare, Humor, Media, People, Philosophy, Science, Technology

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In Sickness and in Health

Posted on June 15, 2013 | 2 comments

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I haven’t written much this week because we’ve had a few medical issues around here. Three were planned, but there was at least one middle-of-the-night exciting surprise. The kids needed to get one last viral ailment before school let out and the dog showed that although he’s very lovable, he’s equally stupid. So five trips to various hospitals, including a veterinarian one, one to the doc-in-a-box, several to various doctors’ offices later, it’s now the weekend.

When I was younger, like most guys (I can’t speak for the female of the species) I saw love in terms of a commitment to “climb the highest mountains and swim the deepest seas.” Now that I’m older and have acquired s modicum of wisdom, I see things differently.

I made my marriage vows to my wife before God. However those vows grew to include not only the two of us but the whole family. “In sickness (and in health”) seems to be more aimed at the kids than each other. Likewise, “for richer or for poorer” – well let’s just say that much of our material wealth has been invested in our children.

“All my worldly goods with thee I share” – when I can’t find a tool, or that ten dollar bill that I had in my wallet, or the nail clippers, or whatever (and the list is impressive) it’s far more likely that one of the kids has borrowed/absconded/taken title to it than my wife.

But what a wonderful life. God, in his wisdom, has given me countless opportunities to share that I otherwise wouldn’t have had. He’s blessed me with a closeness such that if sharing is not completely effortless it is at least totally natural.

Fathers’ Day is tomorrow. Let’s first thank Our Heavenly Father on this day. (Isn’t it quite appropriate that both Mothers’ and Fathers’ days are on Sundays?)

Then, as a father, I want to thank Him for blessing me with my family.

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Posted in Celebrity, Communications, Culture, Family, Friends, Holidays, Media, People, Philosophy, Religion

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Time and Money

Posted on May 25, 2013 | Leave a comment

time-and-money-by-shadphotos

The old saying, “Time is money” resonates with many people. After all, those of us who work for a living exchange our time for our wages.

But there’s a huge difference between the two. First and foremost, you can bank money or you can inherit it, but the time you are given is all that you will ever have.

You can, and should, do good things with money through your church, the Red Cross or whatever, but contributing your time is more heartfelt.

You can spend money on your kids to send them off to a world class boarding school, but spending time with them on school work and after school activities is more precious. Kids may not like to hear that you can’t afford a particular item, but they understand. However, if you don’t share your time when it would be possible to do so, that’s very different.

I think when we face our God, He will but much more interested in how we spent our time and be less interested in what we did with our money.

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Who Speaks for Me?

Posted on May 5, 2013 | 3 comments
theBible_poster_joshua_cc

The Bible
The History Channel
http://www.history.com/shows/the-bible

When we see family or tribal based societies, we have difficulty appreciating them. Many Muslim countries adhere to these relationships just as the Jews did throughout the Bible. The father, as head of the family could speak on behalf of the whole family – and the extended family. All who lived as part of his family were subject to his decisions. Joshua could, therefore, commit his entire household to serve the Lord God.

Imagine how such a commitment might play out today.

“I have committed this family to serve the Lord,” said Joshua as he walked into his suburban home outside a major American city.

“Now, Joshua,” replied his wife. “We’ve talked about you committing me to things without me agreeing to it, first. You can say whatever you want, but don’t expect me to blindly follow.”

“Dad!” replied his eldest son. “All the kids are into worshiping the Baals! I’m not going to be a social outcast, just because of you.”

“Hey, don’t look at me,” replied another child. “I’m your stepson. When I talk to my REAL dad, he’ll be honked off.”

Today the dynamics are different. In a faith centric family, the husband and wife are hopefully already on the same page. Two committed adults are stronger than one and better able to guide the family together. It’s different, in that each of us has more of a voice.

But that means each of us is called upon to commit ourself to God and his way individually as opposed to relying on someone else to commit us.

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Posted in Arts, Communications, Culture, Education, Family, Friends, History, Leadership, People, Philosophy, Politics, Religion

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Enough!

Posted on April 1, 2013 | Leave a comment

It’s never enough.

monopoly_house

 

People who strive to be rich rarely reach the point where they decide that they’ve succeeded. They seem to need to own one more income property or make one more stock killing.

Then there are faces of women on the magazine covers by the checkout counter at the supermarket. Different magazines have the same supermodel/superstar on the cover. Seeing multiple versions of the same face staring at me give me the creepy feeling that I’m at a clone convention.

They go from the “It Girl” to yesterday’s news to the Paparazzi special with no makeup, workout clothes and the expression that precedes a sneeze.

On the other hand, the ordinary people who live paycheck to paycheck and are happy that they look better than their driver’s license photo know that a home and a family is quite enough.

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Why Have Kids?

Posted on January 17, 2013 | 3 comments

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The other day my younger son asked me why I decided to have kids.

Tough question.

Once upon a time kids were an economic benefit. Kids, especially boys, provided a work force for the farm or the herd. Why pay for workers when you can just make them?

However, once we left the farm and moved to modern cities and suburbs, economically that advantage disappeared.

So why DID I decide to have kids?

Actually, when I was younger, I was scared that I’d have a handicapped child. My oldest, in fact, is profoundly handicapped. Interestingly, just before she was born I finished my 24 months in Radiologic Technology, and was trained and more importantly mentally prepared for many of the things that her care would require. Especially the yucky stuff.

Funny how that worked out – you’d think some higher power was involved.

My older son was in high school and I was raising him as a single parent when I met my wife. I thought that my daddy days were coming to a close. Instead we married and decided to have a family.

Funny how THAT worked out – you’d think some higher power was involved.

Which got me thinking – the reason my wife and I decided to have kids was because we wanted to share. Share what we had, but more importantly to share our love.

I guess that desire to share is why God decided to make us – for someone to share with. He set the example for us to follow.

And that’s why we had kids.

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Posted in Culture, Family, History, People, Philosophy, Religion

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Too Close

Posted on December 13, 2012 | 1 comment

One of the problems with living in the real world is that we spend our time too close with the people who are important to us – spouses, children, and friends. As such, we’re so close that we sometimes don’t notice things or if we do, we don’t realize how important they are.

My older son grew to over six foot tall in high school. I was buying his clothes – “Extra Extra Large”, “Tall” and very, very large shoes (size 14 and 15 – just slightly smaller than “Bozo”.)

However, even with all that, he was still my little boy It wasn’t until one Sunday at Mass when I turned to him and realized that my eyes were at the same level as his armpit that it actually registered that my child had grown up.

My younger kids hit different phases in which they suddenly make major progress in one area or another. Sometimes, I don’t notice. Hey, you’re talking to the dad who can buy size 15 shoes for his son and not realize that he’s grown.

My wife is the one that notices all these things and nudges me – “Have you noticed that Adam is doing so well at such and such?” “Isn’t Katie getting good at (fill in the blank)?”

Now, I like to think of myself as intelligent, and I’m actually not oblivious to the world around me. However, having said that, I know that I view the world differently than my wife does. I notice the funny noise when I drive her car and know it needs attention. I realize that the toilet is making an odd sound and needs a new flapper valve and fill mechanism. I do my part. Nevertheless, I miss a lot of important things that she points out to me.

The wonderful thing is that I can’t do her part and she doesn’t do mine. However, between the two of us we get pretty much all of it figured out.

It’s actually a great system.

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