Tag Archives: Redskins

The Washington Redskins Dilemma Solved!

 

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As you know, I’m not much of a sports fan. I also think that most sports teams have strange names.

“The Mighty Ducks?” It’s a good thing it’s not a theological college, or else it might have been “The Almighty Ducks!”

In college I had a nodding interest in football since I was in marching band at the University of Toledo. Toledo’s mascot was “The Rockets—not too bad, really. I thought Kent State University had the weirdest nickname – “The Golden Flashes”; the band cheer when playing Kent was, “What the hell’s a golden flash?”

But then I did my graduate studies at the University of Akron – the home of the “Zips.”

I understand the Washington football team’s problem. Imagine if they were the “Honkies?” – or “the Micks”, “the Wops”, or “the United States Congress!” However, if they are dead set on keeping the name “Redskins” all they have to do is

(Wait for it)

Change the graphics to redskin peanuts!

Imagine the sports commentators, being able to say such things as:

“Well, Washington’s offensive strategy is a typical nut job once again this week.”

“The quarterback is getting ready to pass! There goes the Peanut into the pocket!”

“The Peanuts sacked the Browns quarterback!”

“Washington is favored by at least 7 points against the Ravens, so it’s fair to say that the Ravens are suffering from a severe case of Peanuts envy.”